“Push Presents” – Thoughtful Gesture or an Expected Tradition?

As a mother of three, I’ve had this debate in the Flanagan household more times than I can count! But what is a Push Present you may be thinking? The dictionary defines it as “a gift given to a woman shortly after she has given birth, typically by her spouse or partner.” They have gained traction in recent years and although believed to be an American notion, it has been around in some form or other for quite some time! However, it does beg the question: Are push presents expected or simply a nice-to-have?
 

What is it and how did it Start?

As previously mentioned, a push present is a gift given to a woman after she has given birth to a child. It’s a way to show appreciation for the mother after childbirth; after all the last 9 months and the labour have probably been quite exhausting! It usually takes the form of jewellery, but other sentimental items are also commonplace. But where did this idea come from? Was it really just a marketing ploy to make people spend more money?!
 
The origins of the modern concept aren’t entirely clear, but the notion of giving a gift to a mother after childbirth has existed for centuries in various cultures. For example, in India, some traditions revolve around new mothers receiving jewellery or gold from their husbands and in-laws as a way of celebration but also ensuring financial security. In Japan and Latin America, the idea of giving a new mother a gift is not uncommon either. Surprisingly, in the UK, during the Victorian era, it was common for wealthy husbands to present their wives with jewellery or sentimental keepsakes after giving birth.
 
In modern times, the rise of celebrity and social media have meant that the concept has reached new heights. The phrase became more prevalent in the early 21st century and by the early 2000s, celebrities like Victoria Beckham, Kim Kardashian and Beyoncé received extravagant push presents (think cars and jewellery) which pushed it mainstream.

To be Expected?

So, is a push present an expected tradition, or is it just an extra luxury? Every person and every relationship is different. Some women will expect them as the norm and others will see it as an unnecessary, or even materialistic purchase. There are also cultural considerations to be mulled over. Is it the norm for your partner culturally?
 
There are, however, several positives to giving a push present. The acknowledgement of what your partner has been through emotionally and physically can’t be underestimated. Childbirth and the postpartum time are demanding and can take its toll. By celebrating this life changing moment, you’re forever encapsulating the sentiment in the gift. It can be the welcome emotional uplift and morale boost your partner needs! This in turn, can strengthen your emotional connection to one another, at a time when a woman can feel lonely, stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed.

Popular Presents

Jewellery is by far the most popular choice for a push present. The use of birthstones is common practice, and the item could be a ring, pendant, earrings etc. Many people incorporate their Eternity Ring into this post birth time as a way of celebrating. Whether that be after the first or the last baby! Personalisation is often considered too, whether it’s engraving a date, a child’s initials or designing a bespoke piece that reflects your partner’s style. 
Artwork, spa treatments, photo frames, handbags etc are all thrown into the mix as options. However, the enduring gifts, the ones that stand the test of time, tend to be the ones that are most often given, hence why jewellery is such a popular choice. 

The Great Debate: Celebration vs Consumerism

But surely there is enough expense when it comes to having a baby as it is without throwing a push present into the mix?! The emotional significance of the present will often outweigh the monetary value – and rightly so. If your circumstances allow you to buy a diamond and birthstone ring to mark the occasion, then that is very special. However, don’t get caught up in the commercial expectation. They aren’t obligatory, and you/your partner may think they are frivolous. It’s worth making sure you’re both on the same page though!

Only You Know

Fundamentally, only you and your partner can decide if a push present is appropriate and what type of gift that looks like. Bespoke jewellery does tick several of the boxes for an emotional, uplifting and sentimental present and there are so many possibilities for the way that all these elements can be brought together and represented. 
If you’d like to know more, chat through some ideas or simply want to start your story, get in touch as I’d love to help you find the perfect way to mark this special occasion.